Let’s banish this opening  phrase from our christian mouths: “you know I love you…” 

We all know what is coming next!

 It goes like this, “You know I love you but here is what you did that upset me.” This segue diminishes the words “I love you” because we are not thinking of what was just but what is coming next.


Let me offer my suggestion. I think the intention of part 1 is good but it has been way overused that it doesn’t make people feel good but just cringe as they anticipate the next part. So here is what I propose….let’s put a little effort in Part 1. How about being specific. How about something like this: “Your life is a real blessing to mine. This part of your character is such a challenge to me and has helped me. And because I love and respect you so much, I never want anything to be a wedge between us.  That’s why I want to talk to you. When this happened I was somewhat offended, and I wanted to tell you about it so we can address it.”

 If the person receiving this is wise, he should be praising God that someone loves him enough to confront him. Thank God for those who have confronted me. And everyone who has said to me in the past “You know I love you….” , you have always had my highest good as your intention. 

But let’s all work on a new opening line when we muster up the guts to confront people we love and respect…..me included

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